Participation, Providence and Persuasion – Pt. 2

Good morning, Providence Bible
Church. If you guys would like to open again to the book of
Philemon. Right before Hebrews last week,
we dove into this short epistle. where Paul is writing a letter
to his good friend Philemon. If you recall, Paul was in a
Roman prison. Somehow he still found time to
witness and share the gospel. One such man who got saved was
Onesimus. And we saw that Onesimus was
a slave, a runaway slave, a runaway slave from Colossae, a runaway
slave from Philemon of Colossae, who Paul had led to the Lord
many years earlier. And we saw that Onesimus had
wronged Philemon greatly. Onesimus, still Philemon’s slave,
being born again, he was much more than a slave, as Paul wrote
it. He was a beloved brother, especially
to Paul, but even more so to Philemon. The gospel had transformed
their relationship from a temporal one to an eternal one. Philemon
and Onesimus were now together members of one household, children
of the Most High God, who they would both call Father. They
are in a relationship to Christ, which transformed their relationship
to each other. And that’s what Paul is addressing
here. As children of the Father, begotten through Paul’s ministry
unto the Lord, they were now under new household rules. New
management within the household. And in God’s household, his children
are to live in peace and unity and harmony. And not just to
do so, but he tells us how to do so. Onesimus had sinned against
Philemon, Matthew 5, 23, Jesus says, therefore, if you are presenting
your offering at the altar, so you’re going to worship God,
and there remember that your brother has something against
you, leave your offering there before the altar and go. First,
be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your
offering. So the new household rules dictate that we must be
reconciled with brothers when we sin. Brotherhood demands it. Philemon, as a forgiven man,
must forgive. Onesimus, as a man who sinned,
must go. And that’s what we have. It was
commanded by Jesus Christ that Philemon had to forgive. Luke
17, three through four. Be on your guard, again, Jesus
speaking. If your brother sins, rebuke him. If he repents, forgive
him. And if he sins against you seven
times a day and returns to you seven times saying, I repent,
forgive him. So these men, under new household rules, must be
reconciled. Paul sends Onesimus. And Paul, as an ambassador of
Christ, instructed these men according to God’s word, and
he discipled them unto obedience to it. He sent him back to seek
forgiveness and be reconciled, and he wrote a letter to help
them. So we said last week, the main theme of Philemon is forgiveness.
But last week we looked at the sub theme, which is brotherly
love. Forgiveness is done in brotherly love. And as we considered
brotherly love, we saw how brotherly love, if you look at your bulletin
still, it’s participation. One household, one family, we’re
in it together. In God’s providence, he’s orchestrating
all things out within this family for his glory. And persuasion,
we saw how Paul was discipling both of these men. in obedience
unto God. So this week, we consider the
main theme, which is forgiveness. Let me point out to you that
in this letter, when we read it last week, you never came across the
word forgive, even though the main theme is about forgiveness.
It’s not there. Philemon is like a case study. It’s applied theology. It’s real
life forgiveness. It’s not a parable. It’s not
an allegory. These are real guys with real problems. And Paul
writes this letter, and Philemon was a mature man. He was biblically
literate. He had been instructed well.
In most of Paul’s letters, he spends the first half of his
book laying down all the theology and doctrine, and the second
half applying it. Philemon was a good personal friend. Philemon
knew the first half of the letter, so he got the application. So
when we read it, he’s telling him, forgive and receive like
you would me. Today, we’re going to fill in
the blanks. We’re going to consider what the previous two or three
chapters of Philemon would have been had Paul put the instructions,
the why for what Philemon had to do, so to speak. So just to
refresh our minds, let’s read Philemon again together. Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus,
and Timothy, our brother. To Philemon, our beloved brother,
and fellow worker, and to Appiah, our sister, and to Archippus,
our fellow soldier, and to the church in your house. Grace to
you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. I
thank my God always, making mention of you in my prayers, because
I hear of your love and of your faith which you have toward the
Lord Jesus and toward all the saints. And I pray that the fellowship
of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every
good thing which is in you for Christ’s sake. For I have come
to have much joy and comfort in your love because the hearts
of the saints have been refreshed through you, brother. Therefore,
though I have enough confidence in Christ to order you to do
what is proper, yet for love’s sake, I rather appeal to you
since I am such a person as Paul the aged and now a prisoner of
Christ Jesus. I appeal to you for my child
Onesimus, whom I have begotten in my imprisonment, who formerly
was useless to you, but now is useful both to you and to me.
I have sent him back to you in person. That is, sending my very
heart, whom I wish to keep with me so that on your behalf he
might minister to me in my imprisonment for the gospel. But without your
consent, I did not want to do anything so that your goodness
would not be in effect by compulsion, but of your own free will. For
perhaps he was for this reason separated from you for a while.
that you would have him back forever, no longer as a slave,
but more than a slave, a beloved brother, especially to me, but
how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord. If
then you regard me a partner, accept him as you would me. But
if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge
that to my account. I, Paul, in writing this with
my own hand, I will repay it. not to mention to you that you
owe me even your own self as well. Yes, brother, let me benefit
from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ. Having
confidence in your obedience, I write to you since I know that
you will do even more than what I say. At the same time, also
prepare me a lodging for I hope that through your prayers, I
will be given to you. Epiphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ
Jesus, greets you as do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, Luke, my
fellow workers. The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ
be with your spirit. He’s asking them to forgive,
but he doesn’t even put the word forgive in there. It’s just case
study. It’s applied theology. So let’s
fill in the blanks, shall we? Not much doctrine, just applied
doctrine. Sister letter to this would have
been Colossians. If Ileman was in the Colossians
church, he would have got the letter to the Colossians. Colossians
3.13, Paul writes, bearing with one another and forgiving each
other. Whoever has a complaint against
anyone, just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Maybe you had a copy of the letter
to the Ephesians. Ephesians 4.32, be kind to one another, tenderhearted,
forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven
you. At first glance, we see that
we must be forgiving people because we have been forgiven. But there’s
more in this verse, forgiving each other just as God and Christ
has also forgiven you. So not only must we forgive as
forgiven, but we must forgive in like manner, in the same way,
modeled after God’s forgiveness to us. Now we are not God. If
someone sinned against us, they did so by sinning against God
alone. They did not break our law, they broke God’s law. David
says in his wonderful psalm of confession, after committing
adultery with another man’s wife, getting him drunk, murdering
him and lying about it all, he says in Psalm 51 verse four,
against you, you only have I sinned and done evil in your sight.
I could have listed a few other people besides God alone. The main point is, is that all
sin is first sin toward God. We broke his law, not ours. He’s the one who wrote the law.
When David confesses to God, his relationship with God is
restored. He never lost his salvation, but he had a broken relationship.
Same Psalm 51 verse 12. Restore to me the joy of your
salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit. He didn’t say
restore to me my salvation. He says, I want the joy back,
the sweet fellowship I had with you. When we sin, we sin against
God alone. We do business in confession
with him first. Philemon is a book about reconciliation
between brothers. Our sin affects other people,
too. It certainly did in David’s case. And in those relationships
with fellow believers within the household of God, according
to God’s household rules, they must be restored. They must be
reconciled. Think vertically with God first
and horizontally with brothers and sisters as God our Father. Secondly, we confess to God and
we confess to one another. We’re forgiven and reconciled
in relationship to God, and we’re forgiven and reconciled in relationship
to one another. So when Colossians and Ephesians
say that we must forgive just as God has forgiven you, doesn’t
mean we place ourselves in a position exactly like God’s. However,
it does give us a model, an outline of what our relational forgiveness
with one another must look like, how it must be done. So if our
forgiveness is to be modeled after God’s forgiveness, we need
to understand well how God forgives us. And we’re gonna put together
a working definition then of biblical forgiveness that we
can use this morning. Let’s start with a review of
the gospel, shall we? A gospel primer. We’ll quickly
go through what the gospel is, and I’ll stop a few times drawing
out some concepts that I’d like us to focus on as we consider
God’s forgiveness. And we put together what our
forgiveness and reconciliation with one another must look like.
In the beginning, We have two parties, God and man. At creation,
Adam and Eve. God created Adam and Eve in perfection,
without sin, but with the possibility to sin. He says in Genesis 2,
from any tree of the garden you may eat freely, but from the
tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you shall not eat, for in the
day that you eat of it, you will die. Adam and Eve were perfect,
but they had a choice to sin or not to sin. They chose to
sin. and their perfect relationship
between these two parties had changed completely. We call this
the fall. When they ate of the fruit, their
eyes were opened, they realized they were naked, and they tried
to cover their sin with leaves. This brought God’s curse on creation.
It’s the only thing God could do. He had to because he was
holy, and they were no longer perfect and innocent. Adam and
Eve were fallen into sin, and not just them, but all their
posterity. all of their children from there forth. All mankind
are born into sin. This changed relationship. Man
is no longer innocent. He’s completely sinful. We would
say he is now unholy. God is still holy, completely
holy. We worship a holy God. Even his name is holy. Our father
hallowed be thy name. You think of Yahweh, the Jews
wouldn’t even write it. Man’s now plunged into sin. He’s
born in sin. He chooses to sin. God is completely holy. This
relationship is drastically changed. How do the two parties relate
to each other after the fall? God’s holiness sets the benchmark
for man’s behavior. Leviticus 19, 2, speak to all
the congregation of the sons of Israel and say to them, you
shall be holy. For I, the Lord, your God, am
holy. And humanity has missed the supreme benchmark. That’s
actually sin. It’s the word hamarshia, to miss
the mark. Anything other than the bullseye
is sin. Ecclesiastes 7.20. Indeed there
is not a righteous man on earth who continually does good and
who never sins. Man utterly violates God’s perfect
requirement for obedience. Romans 3.23. For all have sinned
and fallen short of the glory of God. As a result man has incurred
a debt. Romans 6.23. For the wages of
sin is death. Man deserves to die. and be judged
eternally and cast into hell.” That is man’s current state.
But it gets worse. Man’s a slave. He’s a slave to
sin. John 8, 34, Jesus answered them,
“‘Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is a
slave of sin.'” So man has a great need. If there’s any hope for
man, he will need someone else to pay his debt. Problem is he
has zero equity, zero balance, and slaves earn nothing. Man
remains in this sorry state until someone redeems him out of it.
What is a holy God’s response to sin? R.C. Sproul, on one of his many speaking
engagements at various universities, when he would go and speak, tells
the story of a young evangelist at one of these campuses. They
didn’t recognize him, and he came up to him with some tracts in
his hand, and he says, brother, are you saved? And if you guys
know Sproul, he likes to play with people. He said, saved from
what? And this guy kind of stammered and says, Brother, are you saved?
And he said, Saved from what? He said this guy didn’t want
to tell him the hard truth. Most people like to talk about
God’s love, peace, joy, blessings of salvation. But this falls
short of where we should begin. What are we saved from? God’s
wrath. His righteous anger, His judgment
against sin, that’s where we start. There’s no good news without
the bad news. So we talk about this relationship
and the fall and sin. God’s initial response to sin
is wrath and righteous anger. He could not be holy and not
be angry. His holiness demands it. He’s
so holy, He can’t even look upon sin. Habakkuk 1.13, your eyes
are too pure to approve evil and you cannot look on wickedness
with favor. Anger and wrath is the only response
a holy, perfect, righteous, and just God can have towards sin.
There’s two dilemmas in scripture. Man has a dilemma. We’ve already
mentioned it. Scroll again. How can we unjust sinners hope
to survive a judgment before the court of an absolutely holy
and absolutely just God? Herein lies the dilemma. He is
just. We are unjust. If we receive
from his hand what justice is due us, we face an everlasting
punishment in hell. Basically, we’re toast, there’s
nothing you can do about it. That’s man’s dilemma. God has
a dilemma too. He is just and he’s a just judge
and he will judge and he must judge. He will do it perfectly,
Psalm 711. God is a righteous judge and
a God who has indignation every day. God is a wholly just God
who must punish evil. His holiness demands it, but
the Bible says God is love. Love is part of who he is. God
is love, and as a loving God, he desires to extend mercy. If
God is just, he must judge, yet if God is love and he desires
to extend mercy, we come to his dilemma. If he executes his justice
that his holiness demands, he cannot be merciful. If he grants
mercy to a convicted criminal, he is an unjust judge. So how
can God have his cake and eat it too. How can he have it both
ways? And the solution is in the gospel. This brings us to
the gospel. We’re gonna begin with propitiation.
God’s wrath must be satisfied. It must be satisfied with justice. 1 John 4, 10, in this is love. Notice God’s motivating, saving
grace is love. In this is love, not that we
love God, but that he loved us and sent his son to be the propitiation
for our sins. Propitiation means to make appeasement
or satisfaction. If you guys watch any movies
from the Victorian era and you see the gentleman walking with
a hat and a cane and some shirt tails, and there was a commoner
that offended him, what does he say? I want satisfaction.
I want my pound of flesh. I need to have my anger appeased.
That’s propitiation. God’s wrath is satisfied. That’s
what it means. Propitiation is the Greek word
halasmos. It’s used seven times in the New Testament, four times
in your Bible. It’s translated propitiation. It’s used a lot
in the Old Testament, actually, in the Septuagint, when they
translated the Hebrew into the Greek. They use it, I think,
like nine times alone in 10 verses in Exodus chapter 22. 21 where God is giving Moses the
prescription on how to construct the Ark of the Covenant and The
lid over the Ark of the Covenant that your Bible translates mercy
seat is our Greek word propitiation So let’s understand propitiation
Christ satisfying God’s wrath by considering the Ark of the
Covenant for a minute the Old Testament temple sacrifices and
communicated, and it was an illustration of God’s holiness, man’s sinfulness,
God’s wrath, and the sacrifice that satisfied it. Inside the
ark were three things, but one of them was the Ten Commandments.
On top of the ark was a lid with two cherubim on it. The lid was
called the mercy seat, propitiation. Once a year, the high priest
would kill two goats. He would sprinkle the blood of one goat
on the cover, on the mercy seat. underneath the cherubim which
symbolized the throne room of God. Then he would lay his hands
on another goat called the scapegoat that was sent out into the wilderness.
Propitiation and expiation if you want to get technical. One
satisfied his wrath by the blood being spilt One is your sins
are forgiven and forgotten and remembered no more by God. That’s
what it signified. And the significance of this,
what it’s teaching us, the Shekinah glory of God is above the lid
of the ark, his holiness, his perfection, his justice. Under
the lid of the ark are his commandments. God broke his commandments. The
judgment seat where God judged man according to his law that
was broken. when blood was spilled became the mercy seat. That’s
the picture of God’s wrath being propitiated. It had to be. That’s what Christ did. The entire
pageant was a pre-enactment of the gospel. It actually helps
us understand when we come to the word propitiation in 1 John.
God loved us, sent his son to be the propitiation to satisfy
his wrath in your place that the judgment seat might become
the seat of mercy. And God gets to be the just judge
and he gets to extend mercy and grace. The gospel, they say,
at the cross is where justice and mercy meet. Grace is free
to us. The whole point I want to draw
out so far, first one to remember, grace is not free. It cost God
greatly. It cost God greatly. If I, John,
I like using you as analogies. If I were to loan John a hundred
bucks because he needed it, two or three weeks went by and he
had some hard times and it came due. And he said, I can’t pay
it. Will you forgive me? If I say,
okay, and I opened my ledger book and I write forgiven, essentially
what have I done? I’ve taken my own wallet out,
taken a hundred bucks out of my own wallet and paid myself. That’s the forgiveness of God
to us. A debt we can’t pay. He pays
himself. He takes care of it. Let’s think about it a little
farther. Think of a courtroom. God is the author of the law. He
is the interpreter of the law. He is the applier of the law.
He’s on his holy bench. A sinner is brought before him.
His holiness and justice demand satisfaction of the law. His
justice demands a verdict. The just judge can do the only
thing he can do. Guilty. Death. What we see in the scriptures
in an expression of his incredible love, the judge stands up, takes
off his robe of honor, comes down from his bench of honor,
humbles himself, comes up to this convicted criminal and says,
I’ll take your place. I’ll die for you. And the bailiff
hauls him off to the executioner and he kills him. The criminal
is free to go. Because the debt has been paid,
the law has been satisfied. First John 4 says that love is
the motivation and this is love. He loved us and sent his son
to be a propitiation. So first point that we’re going
to use to put together our working definition of God’s forgiveness.
Grace is free to us but it is not free. I said last week love
pays a price. When we forgive another love
pays a price. And it is likewise when we forgive one another. What else? God not only forgives,
but he forgets. The scapegoat into the wilderness,
expiation. Hebrews 8, 12, God says, For
I will be merciful to their iniquities, and I will remember their sins
no more. He will remember our sins no
more. Now God is omniscient. You know what that means? He
knows everything. If God forgets something, does
he still know everything? If God forgot, because David
confessed his sin with Bathsheba. And so God says, yeah, I’ll forget
that. And Israelites would meet at
these feasts and sing Psalm 51. You think God would be in heaven
going, what are they talking about? They keep singing that
song. I’ve forgotten all about that. That’s not it. If God is omniscient, he knows
everything. If that’s the case, then what does it mean when he
remembers your sin no more? He still knows about it. It means
that he will not hold it against us. It has been settled. He will not call it in. He will
not mention it. It will not have a bearing in
how he deals with us. It will not change his commitment
to us as his son or daughter within the family household.
He will not bear a grudge. He will not be cold to you. He
will not bring it up at a convenient time later and browbeat you with
it. He will remember your sin no
more. Full. commitment to not hold our sins
against us any longer. That’s the second point. First
one, grace is gracious, but it’s not free at cost. Second one,
God’s forgiveness is a commitment to not hold our sins against
us any longer. Continuing on, now that the law
is satisfied, the irreconcilable differences have been taken care
of by God and God alone, and now a holy, perfect God is at
peace with us. There is no longer enmity, but
peace. Our relationship has been reconciled. We have reconciliation. And that changes how God relates
to us and we relate to him. We are not just forgiven. We
are adopted. Adoption is God’s gracious act
of including us as members of his family, sons in his household
with all the rights and privileges of our new relationship with
him. As children, we relate to God as father, not judge anymore. He has compassion on us. He provides
for us. He disciplines us. We have assurance
of his love. We relate to Jesus Christ as
our brother, the true begotten of God. We are adopted, but he’s
our older brother, and scripture says we’re co-heirs with him.
The Holy Spirit is involved too. We have the leadership of the
Holy Spirit, down payment for our salvation by the Holy Spirit,
and he testifies of our new relationship with the Father. From the Father,
the Son, and the Holy Spirit, we are kept for the final day
of redemption. So we are family, vertically with the Trinity,
horizontally with one another. Because of forgiveness and reconciliation
and adoption, really, if you think about it, our relationships
should be deeper than everyone else’s in society. And if you
think about what God has done for us in uniting us to Christ,
we have potential to have deeper relationships with one another
than even the angels do. You ever thought about that?
They’re not united to Christ in salvation like his saints
are. Family, order, structure, love,
and commitments are given by God the Father. Our relationship
has gone from judicial to paternal. That’s my whole point. And we
are reconciled. It’s in the spirit of the Lord’s
prayer, or disciples’ prayer, if you will, Matthew 6, Jesus
teaching the disciples to pray. He says, pray then this way,
our Father, not our judge, our Father, who is in heaven, hallowed
be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as
it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive
us our debts. Aren’t they forgiven at justification?
He doesn’t say our judge, he says our father. This is like
David confessing sins to stay in right relationship with his
father. It’s a prayer of relationship to restore us to God, for God
to delight in his children. So forgiveness here is not to
be understood, as between us and a judge, but like a child
to his daddy, to restore, maintain, and delight in fellowship between
us and the Father. But the prayer goes on, and forgive us our debts
as we also have forgiven our debtors. Do not lead us into
temptation, but deliver us from evil, for yours is the kingdom
and the power and the glory of God forever. And then Jesus adds
a postscript here after the prayer. For if you forgive others their
transgressions, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you.
But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive
your transgressions. At face value, that’s a scary
verse. Does not mean we can lose our salvation. It does mean you’ll
have a rift in your relationship with your Father if you don’t
forgive your brother. Forgive us our debts as we’ve
forgiven our debtors. If you don’t forgive, Your relationship
with your father is broken and he’ll withhold sweet fellowship
and forgiveness. So this is relational. It’s not
judicial. Forgiveness is a requirement
for worship. It is a requirement for peace
within the household. And don’t worry if you withhold
forgiveness. He’s a good, perfect father. He will take you to the
woodshed. Hebrews 12. And we can be thankful for that
third point. God’s forgiveness leads to reconciliation. We’ve been adopted. We’re reconciled
to him. We’re reconciled to one another.
So the first one is God’s grace is gracious, but it’s not free.
Second one is he commits not to hold our sins against us any
longer. Third one, God’s forgiveness will lead to reconciliation.
Does he forgive anybody halfway and not bring them into the family? Likewise, when we put this together,
we don’t forgive halfway. and remain unreconciled to a
brother. That’s where we’re going with
this. Question. Moving on to the fourth one.
How do we go from being under God’s wrath to being his children?
We need to get converted, right? How do we get converted? Faith
and repentance. Turn away from your sins and
you turn toward Christ in belief. Now we don’t turn in faith toward
one another, but we do repent to one another in forgiveness,
right? So let’s focus on repentance a little bit. Repentance is a
heartfelt sorrow for sin, a renouncing of it, a sincere commitment to
forsake it and walk in obedience to Christ. It’s not just sorrow. Judas was sorry. Right. It’s sorrow for sin, for Christ. Repentance is rooted in God’s
mercy, not shame in front of mankind or embarrassment. Involves
the recognition and confession of sin and complete truthfulness.
Sorrow and regret over it, and then forsaking of it by turning
to the Lord. It’s a new trajectory on one’s
life, and it involves the whole man. His intellect takes knowledge,
emotions, and our will. True repentance will involve
truthful confession. Confess, Dan mentioned it in
the prayer. It means to stand with God and
agree with him. It’s to say the same thing as. Biblical confession
then is to agree with God. Let’s say I dishonored my mother
and father somehow. Is that breaking a commandment?
Yeah. It’s the first commandment with a promise. Honor your father
and mother. True confession, I would say, God, you said in
your words, honor my father and my mother. I haven’t done that.
I stand with you in judgment over Danny, me, and agree with
you that you are right and a right judge. But then Danny on his
knees says, please have mercy on me. In doing so, I give glory
to God. Did you know that? Joshua 7,
I think 20, when Achan stole some of the gold from Jericho
and all these plagues came on the people and they cast lots
and they finally figured out it was Achan, they say, give
glory to God and confess. Because if you’re in the courtroom
and you say, judge, you’re a good judge and your law is good and
I stand with you and I am guilty, it’s glorifying the judge and
his law and his righteous act. And then we plead for mercy.
Confession. must be shared and true repentance in confession
will be fruitful. Matthew 3.8, therefore bear fruit
in keeping with repentance. It will be evident. So repentance,
grace, commitment to not remember and repentance. Fourth point,
God’s forgiveness is granted only to those who repent, confess
and plea for mercy. That’s what we just covered.
Lastly, our last point we’ll grab. Though there are eternal
consequences for those who refuse salvation, there are also consequences
temporally. So the principle of sowing and
reaping, Galatians 6 verse 7, Paul writes, do not be deceived,
God is not mocked, for whatever a man sows, that he will also
reap. Example, someone may murder someone
else, get thrown in prison, hear the gospel, get saved, are they
still in prison? Someone might be promiscuous,
get HIV, hear the gospel, and get saved. Do they still have
HIV? So there are consequences for sin. It’s the principle of
reaping and sowing. What about Christians with one
another? Exodus 22, 1, if a man steals an ox or a sheep and slaughters
it or sells it, he shall pay five oxen for the ox and four
sheep for the sheep. It’s the principle of restitution.
You have to do what you can to make right what was wrong. Were
there consequences for David when he sinned? There were, and
he received them all from God. There may be consequences for
sin and restitution required. If there’s been theft, financial
injury, slander, whatever, restitution must be a part of the transaction
of forgiving, and a willingness to do so is actually fruit of
a true heart that’s truly repentant. What would be an example today
if a pastor committed adultery on his wife and he truly repented
and sought forgiveness and reconciliation? Could he be restored and forgiven
and reconciled with his wife and the church? Yes. Is he going
to get fired? Yep. So there might be consequences
in forgiveness and reconciliation. That’s the fifth point. So let’s
summarize our five points here using the gospel as our model,
drawing from these principles. Let’s give a simple definition
for forgiveness that we’re going to look at Philemon through. This is the theology that we’re
going to consider what’s happening in Philemon. Definition of God’s
forgiveness. God’s forgiveness is a commitment
by God to pardon graciously those who repent and believe so that
they are reconciled to him. That’s four. Although his commitment
does not eliminate all consequences. God’s forgiveness is gracious.
It cost him. It’s a commitment not to use
our sin as a wild card whenever it suits him. It’s granted when
we repent, it leads to full reconciliation, although not all consequences
are immediately gone. Now, if we take that and Colossians
and Ephesians says forgive as Christ has forgiven you, what
must our forgiveness and reconciliation with one another look like? What
is the prescription given to God’s family? Is it psychology? Is it Oprah? Is it any of those
things? No. If we’re going to have biblical
forgiveness, we need to have a biblical definition. Our definition, our
forgiveness is a commitment by the one sinned against to graciously
pardon the repentant brother and be reconciled completely
to him. Although not all consequences are necessarily eliminated. Our
forgiveness is gracious. It will cost us. That’s what
it means to forgive. I pay his debt. That’s what God did. It’s a commitment
not to forget, not to never talk about the sin again, but not
to hold it against them. It’s granted to one who is repentant.
See, forgiveness and reconciliation aren’t two separate things. It’s
one thing. When God saves someone, You don’t get half. It’s one
thing. I can be forgiven towards someone
in my heart, but until they come and repent, we can’t be reconciled. It leads to full reconciliation
when someone repents, although not all consequences might be
immediately gone. They could be, but not necessarily.
So let’s finally get to our text, Philemon. It’s a case study.
There’s no mention of forgiveness in here. It’s applied theology
of everything we just covered. And we’re going to consider our
cast of characters again. Hopefully this sermon is front
loaded, so the back loaded goes a little bit faster. But with
all the theology that we have now, let’s consider our characters.
Onesimus, he was the offender. He sinned against Philemon. Philemon,
the forgiver. And we have Paul, the intercessor.
and church as the witness, our four characters. Let’s look at
Onesimus, the example of the repentant. I’m gonna read some
verses from Philemon here, and I want you to consider, look
for evidence of true biblical repentance in this guy. Starting
at verse 10. I appeal to you for my child
Onesimus, whom I have begotten in my imprisonment, who formerly
was useless to you, but now is useful both to you and to me.
I have sent him back to you in person, that is, sending my very
heart, whom I wish to keep with me so that on your behalf he
might minister to me in my imprisonment for the gospel. But without your
consent, I did not want to do anything so that your goodness
would not be in effect by compulsion. but of your own free will. For
perhaps he was for this reason separated from you for a while,
that you would have him back forever, no longer as a slave,
but more than a slave, a beloved brother, especially to me, but
how much more to you both in the flesh and in the Lord. If
then you regard me a partner, accept him as you would me. But
if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge
that to my account. I, Paul, am writing this with
my own hand. I will repay it, not to mention
to you that you owe me even your own self as well. Yes, brother,
let me benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.
So the first sign of true repentance I see is confession. We don’t
see any confession there, but how else would Paul have known
he was a runaway slave? How else would Paul have known
that he was useless before? How else would Paul have known
that he defrauded Philemon, perhaps stole something? Onesimus held
nothing back. He was completely truthful. He
was not worried about what anyone would think of him. He spilled
his guts to Paul. Otherwise, Paul wouldn’t have known all
of these things. And if he had held anything back, he would
have been totally ashamed before Philemon and the Colossian church,
because they were all witness to what went down, right? And
they would have played Paul, would not have gone well. Confession
in repentance is totally truthful, totally full, and totally honest.
It holds nothing back. That’s my point. Ron has said
before, lying is a very fruitful sin. You must lie to cover your
lie and continue lying, and on it goes. Onesimus was completely
honest and forthright concerning the circumstances. And Paul would
have instructed him on true confession. We already said it’s to agree
with God. I don’t think if Nesmith says,
yeah, I gotta go say sorry to Philemon, I think he’d say, yeah,
no. Well, I need to apologize to him. Yeah, it’s not in scripture
either. You won’t find that. What is biblical confession? To say the same. You wouldn’t
say, I’m sorry if I offended you, brother. I’ll just say sorry
so that you can get over it, because you’re the one with the
problem, and I’ll just eat it. That’s not it. Ninisimus was completely
transparent. I could hear him because Paul
would have instructed him. Philemon, Exodus 2015, God spoke
these words, you shall not steal. I sinned by stealing. First Timothy
6.1, Paul wrote, all who are under the yoke of slaves are
to regard their own masters as worthy of honor. I sinned by
dishonoring you. Ephesians 6.7, slaves with goodwill
render service as to the Lord. I sinned by being lazy. Those
are all things we know about. Onesimus, because Paul lists
them. First sign of true repentance
is complete and honest confession. Hold nothing back. Second fruit
of true repentance, complete acceptance of consequences. Onesimus
had no idea what Philemon was going to do, did he? Under Roman
law, Philemon could have done whatever he wanted to do. The
norm of the cultural practices of the day was to do something.
But Onesimus went anyway. He was standing there, do what
you want Philemon. He accepted whatever consequences
would have come. Third fruit of true repentance.
Onesimus desired reconciliation, otherwise why in the world would
he go? He wanted to be reconciled to
his brother. It was gonna cost him. For sure
it was embarrassing and shameful in front of the whole Colossian
church, humanly speaking. He desired reconciliation. Fourth,
understanding of retribution. He didn’t expect it to be swept
under the rug. Paul would have known the Old
Testament commands. He would have shared this with Onesimus.
Onesimus would have understood it. However, as a slave who owned
nothing, how could he ever possibly pay it back? It was impossible.
He had no possessions, no wages. It was impossible, which is why
Paul interceded, as we saw last week. Paul did not sweep it under the
rug. He writes to Philemon in verse 18, but if he has wronged
you in any way or owes you anything, charge it to my account. So the
doctrine of retribution still stands. Fifth, obedience. Christ commands it, go be reconciled,
he went. Lay your sacrifice down and go
be reconciled to your brother and then come worship. He went,
1,400 miles away, he went. Philemon, the example of the
true forgiver. Philemon was a good man. He was
well instructed from the word. I know this because Paul feels
no need to teach him anything about the doctrine about forgiveness,
but writes a short 25 verse letter saying forgive. Unlike all the
rest of his letters, we’ve already filled in the blank. So this
is a biblically literate fellow. He would have understood some
things about forgiveness that he should have at this point
been cultivating in his heart, even before Onesimus showed up.
First one. an attitude of forgiveness or
a posture of forgiveness toward Onesimus even before he showed
up. Philemon should have been cultivating forgiveness in his
heart before Onesimus ever arrived. Mark 11 25 Jesus says, whenever
you stand praying, forgive. If you have anything against
anyone so that your father who is in heaven will also forgive
you your transgressions. They’re not reconciled. Someone
forgave. He’s forgiving your heart right
now. Let Lay it on the altar. Philemon
should have had an attitude of forgiveness, though he could
not yet forgive Onesimus, because he had no idea where he was,
right? Until he showed up with Tychicus. What’s the opposite
of a forgiving attitude? Bitterness, resentment, anger,
vengefulness. And those are roots that are
easy to start sinking in our hearts when we’ve been wronged,
right? Best illustration that I came
across by Lehman, forgive Onesimus right now. Put it in a box, wrap
it up, put a bow on it, write for Onesimus and lay it aside.
And if he shows up, give it to him. But don’t open it up and
start playing with that offense again. I was talking to Ron about
this and he had just a really good practical suggestion and
it works. He says, pray for them. You want
to cultivate an attitude of forgiveness in your heart? Pray for them.
By name. But don’t just say, Oh Lord,
be with Joe Schmo. He said, pray something specific.
Pray a specific grace on their life specifically. And it will
change your heart toward them. Let God judge. It’s in Romans,
right? Vengeance is mine. Not mine,
God’s. Trust God. Question, do you think
Philemon maybe prayed for Onesimus to be saved? I don’t know. Jesus prayed for
those who were killing him, Luke 23, 34. But Jesus was saying,
Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.
And this is an unconditional forgiveness for everybody who
was murdering him as slave. That prayer was answered through
God’s electing purposes in about 3,000 people at Pentecost. How
about Stephen? Stephen prayed for those who
were killing him. Luke 7, 59, they went on stoning Stephen
as he called on the Lord and said, Lord Jesus, receive my
spirit. Then falling on his knees, he cried out with a loud voice,
Lord, do not hold this sin against them. Having said this, he fell
asleep. I know of one person who got saved, Saul of Tarsus,
who was standing over his death. So that prayer was answered there.
I don’t know if Philemon prayed for Onesimus, but I think it
would have been appropriate to pray for his salvation, that
God would save him. Second fruit of a true forgiver,
a right perspective of his own salvation. Another way Philemon
could keep his heart from getting bitter and cultivating a willingness
and a readiness and an eagerness to forgive and reconcile is by
remembering his own sin, what he was saved from, what it cost
God. And Jesus gave a parable of that
in Matthew 18. For this reason, the kingdom
of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts
with his slaves. When he began to settle with
them, one who owed him 10,000 talents was brought to him. It’s an enormous amount of money,
but since he did not have the means to repay, his lord commanded
him to be sold along with his wife and children and all that
he had, all his posterity, like Adam, and repayment to be made.
So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before
him saying, have patience with me and I will repay you everything,
which is ridiculous. He never could. And the Lord
said, and the Lord of that slave felt compassion and released
him and forgave him the debt. Who paid? King paid. King paid himself,
wrote forgiven. The debt can’t be called in.
But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who
owed him a hundred denarii, 20 bucks, insignificant. And he seized him and began to
choke him saying, pay back what you owe. So his fellow slave
fell to the ground and began to plead with him saying, have
patience with me and I will repay you. He’s repentant. But he was
unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should
pay back what was owed. How can anyone pay back when
you’re in prison? It’s just vindictive. So when his fellow slaves saw
what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported
to their Lord all that had happened. Then summoning him, his Lord
said to him, you wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because
you pleaded with me. Should you not also have had
mercy on your fellow slave in the same way that I had mercy
on you? And his Lord moved with anger, handed him over to the
torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. My heavenly
Father will also do the same to you if each of you does not
forgive his brother from your heart. So remembering our own
salvation, what we’ve been saved from, what it costs, knowing
that my sin against God is infinitely worse than any sin my brother
can do against me. And I know we can think of some
pretty heinous things that we can do against one another, so
that might be a shocking statement, but your sin against God is infinitely
worse than any sin done to you because it’s an infinitely holy
God. It’s not your sin. It’s His holiness,
and it’s infinite. And Philemon, consider this,
Think about it, don’t forget. Paul, I think, even tugs at this,
if you look at verse 19 of Philemon, when he says, not to mention
that you owe me your own self, remember your salvation. You
can forgive, because you’ve been forgiven. That’s the second way
a true forgiver cultivates a heart that wants to forgive and reconcile.
Third, eager to generously forgive. God forgives eagerly and generously. Consider the generosity of the
father in the parable of the prodigal son. When the son came
back, Luke 15, the son in the pig pens, he got up, came to
his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father
saw him and felt compassion for him and ran and embraced him
and kissed him. That’s eager and generous reconciliation,
right? Before there was confession,
the son said to the father, father, I’ve sinned against heaven and
in your sight. So he’s confessing to God and
his father, full confession. I’m no longer worthy to be called
your son, but the father said to his slaves quickly, bring
out the best robe, put it on him, put a ring on his hand,
sandals on his feet, bring the fattened calf, kill it and let’s
eat and celebrate. For the son of mine was dead
and has come to life again. He was lost and has been found
and they began to celebrate. Now that is a heart of one who’s
eager to forgive. Is God eager to forgive us? Yes. Is he generous when he forgives
us? Yes. Does he fully reconcile with
us? Yes. Cultivate that in your heart. So it was with Onesimus. Philemon
won seven. Paul writes, if then you regard
me a partner, accept him as you would me. Give Onesimus all the
honor that’s due me. Paul wanted Philemon to receive
Onesimus generously. So this is not a grudging, cold,
licking my own wounds type of forgiveness, is it? It’s eager
and it’s generous. You’ve been wronged. Cultivate
in your heart, forgive in your heart right now, don’t be bitter,
and pray and earnestly seek for reconciliation and be eager for
it, should that brother come in repentance. Fourth fruit of
a true forgiver is forgetfulness. God will remember our sins no
more, not hold it against us, neither should we. Philemon must
not remember Onesimus’ sins anymore. The problem with us, in general,
in our sinfulness, When we forgive, we’re really prone to have convenient
memories, aren’t we? What’s the saying? Let’s bury
the hatchet and move on, but we bury the hatchet and we leave
the handle sticking out of the ground close enough to grab it
any time we need it, and that’s what we do. God forgives our
sins, he remembers them no more, meaning he will not bring them
up, browbeat us, or make us feel guilty, or tell the whole world
about it, neither do we. Philemon was to remember his
sins no more. Not that he couldn’t talk about
it, What a wonderful testimony. Share that. We have it written
in a book. We’re talking about it. But he
can’t bring it up in such a way to slander Onesimus, make someone
question his honesty or his character, or to bring it up in a conversation
when it’s useful to manipulate him to get what he needs. Don’t
do that. Talk about it, but don’t do that. Must not be brought up that way
to suggest any moral liability over the forgiven sin. Again,
fifth fruit of a true forgiver, complete reconciliation. I already
said forgiveness, you can’t separate forgiveness and reconciliation.
They’re two sides of the same coin. One coin, one thing. God
didn’t do it halfway and neither do we. If that’s true, then Philemon’s
reconciliation with Nunisimus must be complete. He’s not a
second-rate citizen in the body of Christ. He comes into the
body with full benefits. Philemon’s forgiveness of Nunisimus
must be, by necessity, lead to full reconciliation, or forgiveness
never happened. Let me say that again. Forgiveness
must by necessity lead to full reconciliation or forgiveness
never happened. And I know you’re probably thinking
of extreme things. What about rape, murder, or molestation? And there are biblical answers
to those things, and I’m not addressing those here in Philemon. In 99% of what we deal with,
with relational sins within the churches, this holds true. Forgiveness,
by necessity, must lead to full reconciliation, or it never happened. This is an important one. And
the repentant sinner plays a big part in this. than the forgiver. Let’s look back at Onesimus,
his confession. You can’t have complete forgiveness
and reconciliation without complete repentance. What if Onesimus
only shared half the story with Paul? Paul writes this letter
and he shows up, and Philemon is obligated and he’s under command
to forgive this brother and be reconciled to him, but that other
half is always going to be in the back of his mind. So if you’re
the one who offended, lay it all out there for the sake of
the one who’s going to forgive you. so that it won’t be a hanging
Chad. You guys remember that? It won’t
be just that one thing that’s kind of hanging out there. Both parties come together, and
they both go all the way, and they work together in Christ,
displaying the gospel. Okay, so we’ve seen the repentant,
we’ve seen the forgiver. What about Paul in this story?
Matthew 18, 15, if your brother sins, go and show him his fault
in private. So why was Paul butting himself in? Shouldn’t Onesimus
have gone to Philemon privately? Paul inserts himself in there.
Here’s some suggestions. Philippians 4, 2 and 3, Paul
writes, I urge Yodia and I urge Sintica to live in harmony in
the Lord.” Two gals were having some issues in that church there.
And he says, indeed, true companion, I ask you to help these women.
I don’t know who the true companion was, but there was two women
in church having issues and he asked someone else to get involved
and help them. Was that breach Matthew 18? No. People knew these gals were having
trouble. Sometimes God’s people need help in these matters. Galatians
6.1, Paul writes, Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass,
you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness. The spiritually mature are to
come alongside brothers and sisters in their sin and work to restore
them. like Paul was with Onesimus, and Paul was discipling Philemon.
That included two brothers at odds with one another. Matthew
5, 9, blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons
of God. How can you be a peacemaker if you’re not gonna insert yourself
in something? And we’re all brothers and sisters in Christ. Was Jesus
a peacemaker? Yes, he was. Was Paul mediating
between two brothers? Yes, he was. Was he helping and
encouraging both of them to do the biblical thing called discipleship? That’s what he was doing, yes.
Was he spiritually mature? Yes. So what about Matthew 18? Was Paul disobeying it? I don’t
think so. First one. First reason. It was a public
sin. Had to be dealt with publicly. Private sins are dealt with privately. Sins within the church are dealt
with for who is involved and who knows about it. This was
a sin between two fellas, but the whole church knew about it,
and the whole town of Colossae knew about it. They had to reconcile,
but the church and everybody else had to be witness to it.
Not really a part of it, but witness to it. And because it
involved the church and the testimony of the gospel, it was incumbent
that the leaders, like Paul the Apostle, get involved and do
his part. So that’s the first reason. Second
reason, Onesimus needed help making restitution. He was a
slave. He needed help. Third reason, he needed someone
to testify about him. If he just showed up and said,
hey, I’m a Christian, why would Philemon believe him? He lied
before, stole before. But you have Paul saying, look,
I attest for this guy. He’s a good guy. And he’s been
serving me. And he’s been bearing fruit. And Aristarchus and John Mark
and everybody else bear witness, too. And so does Timothy. So
Philemon could receive this guy. Don’t use Matthew 18 as a loophole in the legal proceedings
to not reconcile with a brother. I’m not saying that Matthew 18
doesn’t mean what it says, and we shouldn’t believe it, but
I have heard stories of someone who needed to confront a brother
in private sin, but they were a little immature and weren’t
sure what the Bible says, and they asked for advice, and when
they came to that brother and said, you know, I’ve seen this,
and we need to work this out, This guy told me to do this.
He says, oh, you already broke Matthew 18. You didn’t come privately.
All of a sudden, the offended became the offender. So if you’re
more mature, deal with the sin, reconcile, and then maybe a couple
of weeks later, put your arm around him and do a study of
Matthew 18. Anyway, that’s just Danny’s opinion there. Do with
it what you will. The church, last one. We are
a family. The church is a family. Family
must live in harmony. Oftentimes within families, there
are broken relationships. Our family has been given instructions
by God on how to forgive and reconcile. We don’t look outside
from the Bible. We don’t apply psychology. We
don’t apply what the world says. We don’t apply what Oprah says.
We don’t apply what any of those things say. We apply what scripture
says, and it says, forgive as Christ has forgiven you. We forgive
because we’ve been forgiven, and we forgive in a way that
models the gospel. And it is extremely important
that we do so. It is critical that we do so.
Our testimony and the gospel itself to a watching world is
based upon how we do it. And we, as a church, are to help
those who are trying to reconcile. Second Corinthians chapter two,
Paul’s writing. First Corinthians, he told him,
you got to kick this guy out of church. He was living with
his stepmom. Gross immorality. He says, we’re
not going to have a church meeting right now. Done. It’s public
sin. Kick him out. And they did. And this guy came
back in repentance. And he writes in 2 Corinthians
2, sufficient for such a one is the punishment which was inflicted
by the majority. So that on the contrary, you
should rather forgive and comfort him. Otherwise, such a one might
be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. Wherefore, I urge you to reaffirm
your love for him. Forgive, comfort, reaffirm your
love. The church was witness to what Philemon was doing in
Onesimus and they should have comforted and rejoiced and encouraged
and come alongside them and extend welcoming grace to Onesimus when
he came in. I had said Remember how I put
it. It is critical that we do this
right for the sake of the testimony. What do I mean by that? And I
couldn’t find who originated this phrase. I’m sure you’ve
heard it before. God is never more like God than when he forgives. What does that mean? At creation,
when God created Adam and Eve and everything was perfect, what
do we know? What would Adam and Eve have
known about God? that he was good, powerful, beautiful, relational,
because he came and had fellowship with them in the cool of the
morning. That’s about it. At the fall,
they learned a little bit more about him. His holiness to the
backdrop of sin was evident. His justice, his wrath. They would have learned a little
bit more. They would know nothing of his love and grace and mercy.
At the cross is where God is fully on display. All of his
attributes. You want to know the answer to
the question, why in the world would God create a world that
would fall into sin? So he can show off all of himself
and share himself with his people. Because it’s only in the cross
where all of God’s attributes are on display. And in the cross
is forgiveness. God is never more like God than
when he forgives. God’s people are never more like
God than when they forgive one another. I’m not saying we’re
gods. We never more reflect God’s character
than when we forgive one another. When we forgive one another,
the way God forgave us, we are modeling the gospel and it preaches. Listen to this last thing. Philemon
is screaming the gospel. This is a practical, real situation
where two men reconcile the biblical forgiveness according to everything
we just lined out here. But look at what it preaches
when it’s done biblically. We are portrayed in Onesimus,
Christ is portrayed in Paul, and God the Father is portrayed
in Philemon. Onesimus was a slave. I was a slave. Onesimus could
not pay. It was impossible. I could not
pay. Onesimus comes to the father
in repentance. I came to the father in repentance. Onesimus
can’t pay the restitution the father demands. Another must
pay it. Paul pays his restitution. Christ pays my restitution with
his life. Paul says, receive him as you
would me. Christ says, receive Danny as you would me. God says,
he owes me too much. I cannot receive Danny because
he has sinned and I am holy. And Jesus says, put it to my
account. I will repay. And the Father received me into
his household as if I was Christ himself, because I have been
granted Christ’s righteousness. In the end of the day, we are
all Onesimuses. We are commanded to forgive.
We are commanded to do so the way God has commanded his household
to do so. And when we do, he is glorified
and it preaches. This would have been a testimony
to the Church of Colossae. May we be a testimony to Fort
Collins. Will you pray with me? Our gracious Father in heaven,
we ask, like Paul did at the end of the letter, may God’s
spirit be with you. May God’s grace be with your
spirit, because we need it. If we are to love one another,
and love is expressed in forgiveness, And if the world gets to judge
us, 1 John 13, 34, by this all men will know that you are my
disciples, that you have love one for another. Lord, may our
love be shown forth in how we relate to one another. May we
forgive as we’ve been forgiven. May we forgive graciously and
eagerly and generously and remember it no more. May we repent in full, truthful,
honest confession all the way. May we be willing to go to one
another and that this would be glorious, that this would be
joyful, and it would bring our fellowship with one another even
closer than before because we get to live out the gospel. Help us in that endeavor as your
people. In Jesus’ name, amen.